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Marriage: Sometimes you know more than you think you know.
Recently I created a list of 13 ways to improve your marriage. The exercise was originally just to build a list post and when I selected the topic I was not thinking very seriously. When I finished, I was amazed at what I knew and felt confident about. This was a far cry from the early days of our marriage when I was clueless. I had to stop and think about how I have grown since then and how I learned to be a better husband. Our marriage has had it’s rocky moments. There were times when I wanted to give up and I know that my wife did too. At several times during our 37 years as man and wife, I was on the verge of a major train wreck which threatened to destroy our marriage. Somehow, we pulled together and over time I became a better husband. How did that happen?
A Book opened my eyes.
There are many things that helped me grow but I received a major boost in insight when about 10 years ago someone suggested that I read Wild at Heart , a book which really opened my eyes about my role as a man in life and in making a good marriage. I came of age in the 60’s and was suckered into the feminist mindset about women and men. I thought that a man should not lead but work together with a woman and let them do their own thing while I did mine. I think it was particularly appealing to me because it was so easy. Or at least is seemed easy to the chicken-hearted young man I was then. The wisdom at the time was that women wanted to lead their own lives without a man to slow them down. I was OK with not leading and being that sensitive man that feminists talked about. I wasn’t going to push my wife around by taking things in hand and leading. I would be sensitive. Only I wasn’t really even good at that. In short, I was a wimp. [continue reading…]
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