by Ralph
on June 25, 2009
Mine was blue
(If you like nostalgia you might like some of the other content here at RalphCarlsonBlog. Those were the good old days but there is more to life than nostalgia. Retirement isn’t for wimps. I explore some ideas about making the most of those golden years. Click here for a sample.)
My first new car was bought for me by my father, the week I got out of the Army. It was not the car I wanted. And certainly not the one I deserved. But it did serve me well through graduate school and well into my professional career. There was a sporty version of the Chevy II with a big engine. Mine was a servicable 6 cylinder (it’s amazing that a six cylinder engine used to be considered small) not the big V-8. It did have a stick shift on the floor (my first and last). And it was exactly the color of the one in the photo.
I was a different person after nearly two years in the Army. Not exactly the trained killer the hippies considered me but more independent and with some income of my own from the GI Bill. I never regarded my parents home as mine after the Army and so my Chevy II represented my independence as I began to make my own life. I remember driving back to Connecticut listening to the ‘new’ Bob Dylan singing Lay Lady Lay, feeling like a grownup (and don’t you think that at 27, it was about time).
I survived the Black Panther takedown in New Haven, finished my degree, met and dated my wife using my trusty Chevy II and it brought me to California once school was finished. I finally sold it in 75. Looking back, my father was right. That Chevy II was the right car for me at that time in my life.
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by Ralph
on June 24, 2009
Mistakes are essential to personal development
Take any leadership class or read any leadership book and you will hear that mistakes are how you grow and progress. That’s a hard lesson for a perfectionist like me. It is also a very important one. Much of my life I have avoided action or decisions because I might be wrong. The fear of being wrong, or of making a mistake kept me from making decisions and moving forward- kept me from becoming the best person I can be.
It is natural to think that being wrong moves you backward and that not making a decision or taking an action keeps you in the same place but it is a big error. Action of any sort moves you forward and inaction, rather than holding your position , pushes you backwards. With action, something happens. It may be good. It may be bad. Many times it is hard to know at first which it is. Either way you have moved into new territory and you are learning more about yourself and your world. Either way you end up in a different place with more experience and better judgment.
Keep your balance by checking the results
You do want to keep some balance. If all your decisions were bad ones then your life would quickly become a mess. And I am sure that you know people like that. Most people are able to tell the difference between a good outcome and a bad outcome and make appropriate changes in how they make decisions. When they make these changes, they have more experience and knowledge about what happens and more confidence in their decision process.
Not only do they learn better how to deal with decisions in areas they know, they also gain confidence to make decisions in areas where they have little knowledge. And when they move into new areas and make decisions either good or bad, they gain knoweldge there which makes the next decision easier and better.
Be willing to mess up
So, my experience has proved to me that I am better served by making decisions, moving on and in many cases messing up than avoiding decisions so that I will not make a mistake. This, like much else in my life, is a struggle with my ego which remains convinced that it’s all over if anybody sees me make a mistake.
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